Ryein was a student worker in the library.  He was a non-traditional student, army reservist from a troubled family but had a heart of gold.  We came from two different worlds but somehow we became friends during our evening shift together.

He helped me to remember what it’s like to be a student: that regardless of where or how we grew up, it’s universally hard to sit in a classroom all day and study during the night.  I, in turned, encouraged him to study, and helped him with research.  But mostly what Ryein reminded me of is that friendship is a two way street.  That even though we are busy and feel like we don’t have time for one more thing or person, we gained as much from our friends as we give to them.

And for students, we hear it time and time again, a personal connection is the key to college persistence and success.  Without a person to listen to them, or cheer them on, or even just to smile at them in the hallways, student persistence rates drop.  So it’s okay to let go of our fear: fear of getting too close, a fear of seeming unprofessional and fear of friendship commitment.

Less than a year after leaving NMC, Ryein took his life.   I think of him often.  I feel good knowing I helped him while he was here.  And I realized that our friendship even teaches me after his passing.  I learned that we can’t live wondering about “what if’s”, that we don’t know the battles others have inside of them, and that sometimes, taking the risk of getting to know someone, is worth it.